DO YOU BLAME YOURSELF FOR WHAT GOES WRONG AT YOUR WORKPLACE?

Have you ever found yourself caught in a cycle of self-blame at work—questioning your worth every time a meeting is canceled or an email feels cold? Many professionals, especially leaders, fall into this mental trap. When a colleague appears distant or a boss seems irritated, it’s common to internalize the situation and wonder, “What did I do wrong?” This constant self-questioning not only undermines your confidence but also skews your perception of reality, often without any evidence to justify such assumptions.

This tendency is known as self-blame leadership—a behavioral pattern where leaders habitually blame themselves for every setback, conflict, or missed opportunity in the workplace. It’s driven by an external locus of control, where your self-worth becomes dependent on others’ opinions and actions. Leaders who operate this way often absorb all the blame because they’ve learned not to blame others, but in doing so, they unknowingly sabotage their own growth and well-being. Over time, this mindset can lead to decision fatigue, strained relationships, and a decline in overall performance.

So, what’s the solution? The answer isn’t to deflect blame entirely, but to shift from self-blame to accepting responsibility. There’s a profound difference between owning your actions and constantly criticizing yourself. A responsible leader reflects on outcomes, learns from them, and makes necessary adjustments—without falling into a cycle of negativity or self-doubt. By doing this, you not only preserve your mental strength but also model resilience and accountability for your team.

Your Good Friend and Mentor

Payal Nanjiani

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